Some Updates for the latest DSM
today in Nut Class we learned about phobias and other neuroses. here are some little-known ones i think are pretty important in our current world:
palmalivophobia: fear of clean dishes.
zoorophobia: fear of U2.
sucrofun-ophobia: fear of Fun Dipps or Pixie stix.
disenfranchosis: intense sweating, palpitations and skin rash when confronted with GOP politics. may also include diarrhea and welfare.
generalized affixitosis syndrome: sexual arousal brought on by Scotch Tape and other popular adhesives.
perpetual residual unspecified bettycrockeriasis (PRUB): trauma induced by intense wanting (and never having received) an Easy Bake Oven as a child.
hydrofelaromitism: preoccuaption with sniffing wet cats. common in veteranarians.
granular groin syndrome: possessing a constant sand-wad in yr bathing suit.
cleaval aerosuspention disorder: wearers of push-up bra's.
frigid syrupeanutitus: trauma induced by intense wanting (and never having received) a Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine as a child.
snuffleuffophobia: fear of large, hairy quasi-mastodon creature on popular children's television show.
rectovisual verbatim-adnauseam syndrome: disorder in which the individual, in addition to observing posteriors of others, is compelled to repeatedly report his/her findings on the subject in question, i.e. "Did you see the ass on her??" [see also boobovisual-]
-----> related disorders: see rampant violence-response commentosis satiation: subject (often female) grows tired of her recto-/boobovisual verbatim adnauseam partner and reacts, quite often in the public arena, by pouring a drink on him, bitch-slapping him, or simply cowering in the obscurity of self-loathing and inadequacy.
often these victims will later employ kickassicistic menengrageme tactics. the key to
rehabilitation is empowerment and often lookimagoddess-hooyeh tribalism with others
of similar gender, or the "I Rock, You Rock, We Rock" school of transactional analysis. recovery is variable but is almost certain!! :)
see? if only these things were in the DSM, psychiatric professionals would have a lot less work to do!
ok, time to snort some lines.
palmalivophobia: fear of clean dishes.
zoorophobia: fear of U2.
sucrofun-ophobia: fear of Fun Dipps or Pixie stix.
disenfranchosis: intense sweating, palpitations and skin rash when confronted with GOP politics. may also include diarrhea and welfare.
generalized affixitosis syndrome: sexual arousal brought on by Scotch Tape and other popular adhesives.
perpetual residual unspecified bettycrockeriasis (PRUB): trauma induced by intense wanting (and never having received) an Easy Bake Oven as a child.
hydrofelaromitism: preoccuaption with sniffing wet cats. common in veteranarians.
granular groin syndrome: possessing a constant sand-wad in yr bathing suit.
cleaval aerosuspention disorder: wearers of push-up bra's.
frigid syrupeanutitus: trauma induced by intense wanting (and never having received) a Snoopy Sno-Cone Machine as a child.
snuffleuffophobia: fear of large, hairy quasi-mastodon creature on popular children's television show.
rectovisual verbatim-adnauseam syndrome: disorder in which the individual, in addition to observing posteriors of others, is compelled to repeatedly report his/her findings on the subject in question, i.e. "Did you see the ass on her??" [see also boobovisual-]
-----> related disorders: see rampant violence-response commentosis satiation: subject (often female) grows tired of her recto-/boobovisual verbatim adnauseam partner and reacts, quite often in the public arena, by pouring a drink on him, bitch-slapping him, or simply cowering in the obscurity of self-loathing and inadequacy.
often these victims will later employ kickassicistic menengrageme tactics. the key to
rehabilitation is empowerment and often lookimagoddess-hooyeh tribalism with others
of similar gender, or the "I Rock, You Rock, We Rock" school of transactional analysis. recovery is variable but is almost certain!! :)
see? if only these things were in the DSM, psychiatric professionals would have a lot less work to do!
ok, time to snort some lines.
posted by jamie lynn at 1:43 AM
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